“You must unseat that devil, the ripe demon who has straddled your rounded assets. Burn oh legs, gasp thy lungs, carry forth this worthless carcass of fat and atrophied meat. Explode towards the Heavens! For only there will you understand the true power of the Füste!”
SCHMERZENFÜSTE
Complete one of the following EXERCISE parameters to earn YOUR DAILY SCHMERZENPUNKTE
RUNNING: Outdoor ✅/INDOOR ♥️
All runs must be completed with a split time of 15min/mile or better:
Singelt: Complete a 3 mile run in under 45 minutes
Doppelt: Complete a 6 mile run in under 1 hour and 30 minutes
Trippelt: Complete a 8 mile run in under 2 hours
WALKING/hiking ✅
All walks/hikes must be completed in a single event and maintain a split time of 20min/mile or better (hikes with excessive altitude gain may be excluded from this split time requirement; check with GG). Weight reduction option not available if using a walk to complete a distance based bonus (e.g. Long Winter Wog series):
Singelt: Walk or hike outside for 4 miles; reduce to 3 miles by carrying 15 pounds
Doppelt: Walk or hike outside for 7 miles; reduce to 6 miles by carrying 15 pounds
Trippelt: Walk or hike outside for 9 miles; reduce to 8 miles by carrying 15 pounds
ROAD CYCLING ✅
Singelt: Ride outdoors for 15 miles or 1000ft in elevation or ride an indoor trainer for 45 minutes
Doppelt: Ride outdoors for 30 miles or 2000ft in elevation or ride an indoor trainer for 1 hour and 30 min
Trippelt: Ride outdoors for 40 miles or 2500ft in elevation or ride an indoor trainer for 2 hours
“Off road” BIKING (experimental category 2026) ✅♥️
Mountain biking, gravel riding or cyclocross workouts have no strict mileage or elevation requirements. Rides must be on trail. GPS tracking and HR monitoring must show a clear course of difficulty to include frequent elevation changes and periods of intense HR activity:
Singelt: Ride outdoors for 45 minutes
Doppelt: Ride outdoors for 90 minutes
Trippelt: Ride outdoors for 2 hours
swimming ✅
Singelt: Swim 1500 yards
Doppelt: Swim 2640 yards
Trippelt: Swim 3960 yards
sPinning ♥️
Singelt: Complete a “Peleton” class or similar “spin” class lasting at least 45 minutes
Doppelt: Complete 1 hour and 30 minutes of spinning
Trippelt: Complete 2 hours of spinning
rowing ♥️
Singelt: Row 7000 meters
Doppelt: Row 12500 meters
Trippelt: Row 18000 meters
HOME WORKOUT ♥️:
Singelt: Complete a home-based workout (HIITS, garage gym, something like that) lasting approximately 45 minutes (may combine different activities to earn total time)
Doppelt: 1 hour and 30 minutes
Trippelt: 2 hours and 15 minutes
CLASS WORKOUT ♥️:
Singelt: Complete a class-based workout (Cross-Fit, Orange Theory, pilates, hot yoga etc.) lasting approximately 45 minutes (may combine different activities to earn total time)
Doppelt: 1 hour and 30 minutes
Trippelt: 2 hours and 15 minutes
FLEISCHKOPFÜSTEN ♥️
Singelt: Complete a 45 minute gym based work-out
Doppelt: 1 hour and 30 minutes
Trippelt: 2 hours and 15 minutes
Sportenfüsten ♥️
Singelt: Play competitively a one on one or team based game (e.g. tennis, basketball, indoor soccer etc.) lasting at least 45 minutes
Doppelt: 1 hour and 30 minutes
Trippelt: 2 hours and 15 minutes
*Don’t see your favorite form of exercise on the list? Just reach out to GG and we’ll see how to make it work some punkte . . .
While you are on your honor for Foodenfüste and Drunkenfüste, to earn your Schmerzenpünkte you must provide proof of daily exercise. During Period I, you may only complete a Singelt (single) daily exercise parameter (see below). As the game progresses, you will be offered the amazing chance to complete Doppelt (double) and Trippelt (triple) exercise parameters. In order to be awarded your hard earned punkte, you must either complete a GPS tracked workout (denoted on the list below by a ✅) or provide GG with heart rate data (denoted on the list below by a ♥️) and a workout summary showing you completed the exercise based on the requirements listed below.
GPS Tracking ✅
It is highly recommended that you use the free STRAVA app to record, track and post your daily workouts. Go here to visit the STRAVA website and set up a new user account (if you don’t already have one). Then download the STRAVA app onto your phone, log-in and search for the "The Füste 2025" Club and request to join. You can now use the STRAVA app to track any workout that is distance based like running, walking and cycling (and some non-distance based workouts too, e.g. rowing). Swim workouts can be uploaded to STRAVA via a secondary device like an Apple Watch (using the MySwimPro app) or a linked Garmin or Wahoo device. If you choose to not use STRAVA, you will need to send GG proof of your GPS based workouts using whatever other app you’ve decided on. The easiest way to do this is to simply take a screen shot of your routing (with time and distance data clearly visible) and text it to GG each day as needed.
Heart Rate Data ♥️
In the event that your workout is not distance based and therefore not trackable by GPS and cannot be uploaded to the free STRAVA app because either it can’t/won’t (due to equipment/app limitations) or you’ve chosen to not use STRAVA, you will be required to send GG heart rate data and a workout summary as proof of completion (via text). All workouts listed below and denoted with the ♥️ symbol have this requirement. The easiest way to send proof is to simply take a screen shot of your workout summary (with HR data clearly visible) and text it to GG each day as needed.